Wahhh, "Just Hit Delete"

Anonymous writes, "If someone can't use e-mail lists for marketing to potential customers how does one then share the message about a super product or service. I enjoy receiving information. If I do not wish to view the e-mail, then I simply delete. Please advise."

I asked around for a bit of feedback on this one, and the universal response seemed to be that nobody cares what you think. My friend Doug Lim provided this reply, my favorite: “You seem like a total douchebag. Please advise.” This was typical of most of the responses.

Keep in mind that this isn't about you. Nobody really cares that you enjoy receiving information, and that you're happy to hit delete. Hit delete all day long, and good for you. For the rest of us grownups out here on the internet, spam is a big problem. I personally get over 10,000 spam messages a day (I've probably been on this internet thing a bit longer than you), and I'm not even running an ISP. ISPs get billions of spam messages a day, and “how much spam a user receives” is commonly, repeatedly noted as a significant measure as far as a user's satisfaction with a particular ISP. Meaning, “I receive too much spam” is a big reason users jump ship and change email addresses.

And do you really trust all those spammers who are emailing you? That information you want to receive? Seriously? These are guys that hack into computers and try to hide who they are. Some of them end up in jail. Some of them hide out in faraway lands. Just about all of them lie, cheat and steal. If you're buying stuff from spam, I worry about you.

You know how there's that one bar you've been to, the dive bar where everything is just a little too grimy? Where you might be OK with ordering a beer in a bottle, but you'd be afraid to drink anything that comes in a glass, because the glass looks dirty and they're probably going to water down your drink? And hopefully not with something that will cause a stomach virus? Buying something from spam is like that. I wouldn't trust that anything being sold is legitimate. It could be legitimate. But it could also be some knock-off thing from some third world country that will catch on fire, turn out to be a placebo (or a poison) instead of the desired drug, or just not work at all. And watch out for what could happen with your credit card number after you gave it to those guys in the Ukraine.

And if this is what smart people think about spam and spammers, are you sure you want to be viewed similarly?


  1. I don't know if Mr. D. Bag posted anonymously, if he did, one wonders why. Wouldn't he be interested in all the offers the net has for him? Why the need to hold back the name?


Comments policy: Al is always right. Kidding, mostly. Be polite, please and thank you.